Funny Friday

Trump has announced that he has all the necessary materials to build the wall along the Mexican border.

Everyone should have known this.

When Trump won the election, 60 million Democrats shit a brick…

—oo—

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Introducing Failey’s comet:

 

 

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Trump just keeps winning…

 

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On January 20, 2017 …

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On January 21, 2017, Barry goes back to his former job with his buddy Reggie Love:

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(Special thanks to Wendy, Skip, Gil for their contributions)

Have a great Friday.

Two weeks from today we have a new president and the end of an error.

MAGA

~ Hardnox

 

About Hardnox

Constitutional Conservative that Lefties love to hate.
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4 Responses to Funny Friday

  1. vonMesser says:

    Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?

    Officer: Ma’am, you were speeding.

    Woman: Oh, I see.

    Officer: Can I see your license please?

    Woman: I’d give it to you but I don’t have one.

    Officer: Don’t have one?

    Woman: Lost it 4 times for drunk driving.

    Officer: I see…Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.

    Woman: I can’t do that.

    Officer: Why not?

    Woman: I stole this car.

    Officer: Stole it?

    Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.

    Officer: You what?

    Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see. The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for backup.

    Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.

    Officer2: Ma’am, could you step out of your vehicle please! The woman steps out of her vehicle.

    Woman: Is there a problem sir?

    Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you stole this car and murdered the owner.

    Woman: Murdered the owner?

    Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.

    The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.

    Officer 2: Is this your car, ma’am?

    Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers. The officer is quite stunned.

    Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license.

    The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer.

    The officer snaps opens the clutch purse and examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.

    Officer 2: Thank you ma’am, one of my officers told me you didn’t have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.

    Woman: Bet you the lying bastard told you I was speeding, too!

  2. I.R. Wayright says:

    In one of their transition meetings Donald Trump suggested to Obama that he ought to take up fishing in his retirement. When Barry asked him why, Trump replied, “Well, you’ve certainly opened enough cans of worms to last you quite a while.”

  3. Terry says:

    Funny stuff guys !!
    ——————-

    Cletus is passing by Billy Bob’s hay barn one day when, through a gap in the door, he sees Billy Bob doing a slow and sensual striptease in front
    of an old green John Deere.

    Buttocks clenched, he performs a slow pirouette, and gently slides off first the right strap of his overalls, followed by the left. He then hunches his shoulders forward and in a classic striptease move, lets his overalls fall down to his hips, revealing a torn and frayed plaid shirt.

    Then, grabbing both sides of his shirt, he rips it apart to reveal his stained T-shirt underneath. With a final flourish, he tears the T-shirt from his body, and hurls his baseball cap onto a pile of hay.

    Having seen enough, Cletus rushes in and says, “What the heck’re ya doing, Billy Bob?”

    “Good Lord, Cletus, ya scared the bejeezers out of me,” says an obviously embarrassed Billy Bob.

    “But me ‘n the Ol’ Lady been havin’ trouble lately in the bedroom department, and the therapist suggested I do something sexy to a tractor.”

  4. vonMesser says:

    OLE AND SVEN
    Our two good Minnesota boys are at it again…

    Ole and Sven were drinking buddies who worked as aircraft mechanics in Minneapolis, and one day the airport was fogged in and they were stuck in the hangar with nothing to do.

    Ole said, “I vish ve had somethin ta drink!” Sven says, “Me too. Y’know, I hear ya can drink dat jet fuel and get a buzz. Ya vanna try it?”

    So they pour themselves a couple of glasses of high octane hooch and got completely smashed.

    Next morning Ole woke up and is surprised at how good he feels. In fact he feels GREAT! NO hangover! NO bad side effects. Nothing!

    The phone rang. It was Sven who asks “How iss you feelin dis morning?”

    Ole says, “I feel great. How bout you?”

    Sven says, “I feel great, too. Ya don’t have no hangover?”

    Ole says, “No dat jet fuel iss great stuff — no hangover, nothin. Ve oughta do dis more often.”

    Sven agreed. “Yeah, vell, but dere’s yust vun ting.”

    Ole asked, “Vat’s dat?”

    Sven questioned, “Haff you farted yet?”

    Ole stopped to think. “No”

    “Vell, DON’T, ’cause I’m in Indiana”