Florida Domestic Battery Case Using a What??

From Smoking Gun:

Cops Arrest Woman, 57, For Battering Female Domestic Partner With a Dildo

A Florida woman is facing a domestic battery charge after allegedly using a dildo to batter her female domestic partner during a fight in the couple’s residence, police allege.

The confrontation Saturday evening occurred while a St. Petersburg Police Department officer was inside the home of Annette Kielhurn, 57, and Gamze Capaner-Ridley.

The cop was present to oversee Capaner-Ridley’s removal of personal belongings from the house, a move apparently prompted by Capaner-Ridley’s filing the prior day for a civil domestic violence injunction against Kielhurn.

After the women tussled over possession of a dress, Officer Eric Blomgren directed Kielhurn not to touch the 47-year-old Capaner-Ridley. However, “Shortly afterwards the defendant intentionally shoved a ‘dildo’ in the victim’s face and grabbed her right arm while arguing whose it belonged to,” Blomgren reported.

As a result, the cop arrested Kielhurn for domestic battery. An arrest affidavit does not indicate whether the dildo was seized as evidence.

Seen above, Kielhurn–who has Capaner-Ridley’s first name tattooed on her chest–was booked into jail on the misdemeanor charge. She was released from custody after posting $500 bond. According to court records, Kielhurn was arrested in late-June for trespassing (and the case is pending).

Kielhurn, a former New York State corrections officer, served about three years in prison for narcotics trafficking after a 1996 police search of her rental car turned up 25 kilos of cocaine in the vehicle’s trunk.

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Thanks goodness it’s funny Friday, because this post just wouldn’t fit any other day. It’s too ridiculous to go in with our regular posts, but it’s also too ridiculous not to share. The stuff that cops have to put up with is sometimes unimaginable, but to have to oversee a scenario where two lesbians are breaking up and fighting over a dress is not something you see every day. Then to see one of them attack the other one with a dildo is just…wow.

The officer’s report can be seen here, but it doesn’t state if the dildo was charged, or if it had been used in prior assaults. Nor does it say if Kielhurn had a concealed carry permit.

You just can’t make this stuff up folks. 🙂

~Kathy

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7 Responses to Florida Domestic Battery Case Using a What??

  1. Hardnox says:

    Words fail me. This is too funny. 🙂

  2. vonmesser says:

    Assault with a dude(ly) weapon?
    Assault with a battery?
    It’s gotta be the silly season.

  3. 219rad says:

    All dildos should now be registered to make it more difficult to be used as a weapon and to cut down on domestic violence. Actually the cop instigated the use of the dildo when he told one lezzie to keep her hands off.

    He should have used good judgment by holding up the dress with a pair of scissors and told them he would cut the dress in half to end the dispute while he waited to see which one would let him cut the dress, then give the dress to the other. OMG – that almost sounds like a Bible story.

    • Kathy says:

      That would have been fun to watch had the cop thought of that, lol. I imagine that cop was just wishing someone would beam him up.