A group of women were at a seminar on how to live in a loving relationship with their husband. The women were asked, “How many of you love your husband?”
All the women raised their hands. Then they were asked, “When was the last time you told your husband you loved him?”
Some women answered today, a few yesterday, and some couldn’t remember.
The women were then told to take out their cell phones and text to their husband: “I love you, sweetheart.”
The women were then instructed to exchange phones with another person, and to read aloud the text message they received, in response.
Below are 12 replies. If you have been married for quite a while….a sign of true love….who else would reply in such a succinct and honest way?
1. Who the hell is this?
2. Eh, mother of my children, are you sick or what?
3. Yeah, and I love you too. What’s up with you?
4. What now? Did you crash the car again?
5. I don’t understand what you mean?
6. What the heck did you do now?
8. Don’t beat about the bush, just tell me how much you need?
9. Am I dreaming?
10. If you don’t tell me who this message is actually for, someone will die.
11. I thought we agreed you wouldn’t drink during the day.
12. Your mother is coming to stay with us, isn’t she?
Two good ol’ boys in an Alabama trailer park were sitting around talking one afternoon over a cold beer after getting off work at the local Nissan plant.
After a while the 1st guy says to the 2nd, “If’n I was to sneak over to your trailer Saturday and make love to your wife while you was off huntin’ and she got pregnant and had a baby, would that make us kin?”
The 2nd guy crooked his head sideways for a minute, scratched his head and squinted his eyes thinking real hard about the question.
Finally, he says, “Well, I don’t know about kin, but it would make us even!”
Two guys, one old, one young, are pushing their carts around Wal-Mart when they collide.
The old guy says to the young guy, “Sorry about that. I’m looking for my wife, and I guess I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going.”
The young guy says, “That’s OK, it’s a coincidence. I’m looking for my wife, too… I can’t find her and I’m getting a little desperate.”
The old guy says, “Well, maybe I can help you find her… what does she look like?”
The young guy says, “Well, she is 27 yrs. old, tall, with red hair, blue eyes, is buxom…wearing no bra, long legs, and is wearing short shorts.
What does your wife look like?’ To which the old guy says, “Doesn’t matter, — let’s look for yours.”
(hat-tip Hershey, Gil, Gene)
Have a great Friday.