“When Barry Met Moochie” : The Movie

1st date

When Harvard law student Barry Obama took a summer job at Chicago’s prestigeous Sidley Austin law firm, the world was unaware that history was being made.  It was there where, according to her supervisors, the uppity bitch and second-year associate Michelle LaVaughn Robinson, eager to change the world, was making a name for herself complaining about being treated as a second-year associate.

It was while tagging along behind Michelle, Barry’s advisor at the time, that the earth moved for the future POtuS, and not because the bulk in her over-ample butt caused the building’s rafters to shake.

After loving her from afar, and with a lot of arm twisting and haranguing by Revrun Jeremiah Wright, Michelle finally agreed to lower herself and accept a date with the first-year law student.  On that momentous day, the duo sauntered around the Southside of Chicago, providing the young, love-struck community organizer with the huge bat ears the chance to clearly sweep the object of his affection right off her size-11 feet.

The date was a success because the lovers were married in 1992.  Then in 2012, the site of the Obamas’ first kiss, (which Bat Ears said tasted like chocolate), outside a Baskin-Robbins ice cream shop in Chicago’s Hyde Park, was memorialized with a city plaque

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Since then, ice cream of every flavor, and from every corner of the globe, (courtesy of tax payers) has occasionally been spotted on the front of both their shirts.

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Now, here we are, a mere twenty-something years later, and finally a film will recount the summer of 1989 when Barack enticed America’s future first lady to take a stroll, enjoy the cultural sights at the Art Institute, and hold hands while watching “Do the Right Thing”, well known race baiter Spike Lee’s movie about sizzling summer days, pizza, and racial unrest.

So move over, Gone with the Wind and Titanic,  because Moochie and Barry’s steaming hot passion is about to make its way onto the silver screen. That’s right – the epic romance story Southside With You, due to begin filming in July of 2015, is poised to fly like a poisoned dagger straight into America’s hearts.

Southside With You originated in the fertile minds of producer Richard Tanne, who wrote the screenplay, and  Get On Up actress Tika Sumpter.  Producers Tracey Bing, Richard Tanne, and Columbia Pictures alumni Stephanie Allain inexplicably view the Obama romance as one of the “great love stories of our time.”

Sumpter and Tanne developed the script and will co-produce the flick. In fact, Tika is so committed to the project that instead of offering Whoopi Goldberg the leading role, she cast herself as the warm and always welcoming Michelle,1st date 10 which is sort of like actress Halle Berry casting herself as Texas congresswoman Sheila Jackson Lee. I would suggest that this actor would be perfect in the role of Wookie :

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According to Tracey Bing, “Richard really captures the essence of that romantic connection between Barack and Michelle that is so evident in the way that they look at each other.”

Well!  America certainly looks forward to witnessing those scenes. I hope that the movie will capture some of the more notable side-glances Moosie has shot Barry’s way over the years.

 

Tracey Bing did add, “We are looking forward to finding the perfect Barack.”

Well good luck with that. Hitler, Marx and Mao are all dead.

Unknown at this time is whether the film will chronicle the couple when Moochie was still ‘Michael’, or after.

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That can definitely cause a casting snafu.

Nonetheless, if perchance the green-lit project should fall through, there’s always plenty of material for a movie chronicling the authenticity of the Clinton marriage. And with any luck, the currently hot, amply-sized actress/comedian Melissa McCarthy will be available to star as Hillary.

 

However, descriptions of that first date one summer afternoon in 1989 seem to have scrubbed a significant detail.
In 2009, Michelle Obama said the first date included a trip to a “community meeting” in which Barack Obama paraphrased radical community organizer Saul Alinsky.
The “community meeting” visit is not mentioned once in news media descriptions of the coming film.
Nor is it mentioned in a 2012 video posted at Barack Obama’s official YouTube account recounting the first date. This video is currently being utilized to promote the upcoming film.

 
“He was showing me all facets of his character,” said Michelle Obama in the video.
 
The first couple failed to mention the trip to a “community meeting” described in 2009 by Michelle Obama in a videoed talk to London’s Elizabeth G. Anderson school.
 
Stated Moochie : 
“And these were the same qualities that I looked for in my own husband, Barack Obama. And when we first met, one of the things that I remember is that he took me out on a date. And his date was to go with him to a community meeting. (Laughter) I know, how romantic. (Laughter) But when we met, Barack was a community organizer. He worked, helping people to find jobs and to try to bring resources into struggling neighborhoods.”
 
Moochie went on to quote her husband’s speech to the “community meeting” in which Barack Obama paraphrased Alinsky.
“As he talked to the residents in that community center, he talked about two concepts. He talked about ‘the world as it is’ and ‘the world as it should be.’ And I talked about this throughout the entire campaign. What he said, that all too often, is that we accept the distance between those two ideas.”
She noted that Barry was so shy and tongue tied, he asked his friend to accompany them on their first couple of dates, to help him communicate his feelings towards Wookie. Here he is seen asking Moochie if she would like to go ‘chooming’ :
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Of course, over time, and with the help of teleprompters, Barry and Moochie became more comfortable with each other. By their 4th date, they were able to unwind and Barry took his Bride-To-Be to his favorite establishment, Chicago’s own “Man’s Country”, where they were really able to let loose and be themselves.
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And thus, the ‘Fairy Tale’ began……. 
~Terry

 

 

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18 Responses to “When Barry Met Moochie” : The Movie

  1. Hardnox says:

    LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Well done Terry.

  2. Wendy says:

    Sparks do fly when an openly gay man has found true love with a transvestite!!!

  3. CW says:

    Bonded by a shared love of radicalism. Isn’t that special?

    I would suggest getting Curious George to play Obama except that C.G. is actually cute.

  4. Kathy says:

    Talk about a horror movie! Who in their right mind would spend time and money to watch them? Ugh.

    I have to tell ya though, Moochie is a female and always has been. I found grade-school pictures of her and she was just as ugly then. I’ll send them your way.

    • Terry says:

      You know the answer to that question, Kathy.
      But on the bright side, they wouldn’t be rioting for a couple of hours !

      As for the pictures of Moochie, I would have to personally see her nude at the moment of birth before I would believe that thing is female !

      EEEwww..I just made myself throw up in my mouth a little….

  5. clyde says:

    Prick. WHERE was the barf bag alert ??? bwahahahaha

  6. Bullright says:

    Great write-up, its sure to be a real tear jerker.(he’s caused a lot of tears) Another romanticized account of them doing what they do best — revise history.

  7. Hardnox says:

    Looking at the first pic again made me think Wookie’s face would make a freight train take a dirt road.

    The lefty media must be totally blind claiming she’s elegant in any way shape of form. On top of that she dresses like a clown.

  8. Terry says:

    **UPDATE**UPDATE**UPDATE**UPDATE**

    It’s rumored that the screenplay for “When Barry Met Moochie Part Two–The Divorce” has begun,

    Shooting will begin shortly after zero leaves office in 2017, and wookie has to pay for her own vacays.

  9. upaces88 says:

    Joan Rivers brought up Michelle as Michael….soon afterwards, she was dead(?)